Hi Dino,
I'm not back to work yet but I can relate to what you're saying. It's often hard to fit in to large groups and it's even worse when you feel like you've fallen outside the group and have to fight to get back in. In my time with the Anxiety Forum, I've met lots of people who feel very similarly to you. So yes, I would say your feelings are quite normal for social anxiety.
CBT may well be very useful to you in helping to formulate strategies to cope better with your problems. In the meantime, have you considered a self-help book? They're not for everyone but at least you'll be doing something positive while you wait for CBT. Probably goes without saying but for all forms of anxiety, regular exercise helps to reduce your underlying stress levels and your ability to cope with stress.
If I could offer one piece of unprofessional advice, it would be to always remember that you are a worthwhile and normal person who experiences anxiety in certain situations. Underneath your problems and despite them, you are just as good and worthy a person as any of your workmates. (It's hard to say that without sounding patronising)
Best wishes,
Martin.
